T - 14 days: Monsoons, Caravans and too many Jolly Ranchers

So this is going to sound boring and smug, but no problems on Monday after Sundays 21 + an extra bit miler. *Does smug face*

Monday I had to do a 3 mile run in the evening. Some would call this a recovery run I suppose, for the non runners reading the idea is the day after a long run a short slow run is helpful. I've read many articles about this - some say it helps get lactic acid out of your legs, however during a long run there shouldn't really be much of that. I've also read even after the most hardcore workout your lactic acid levels go back to normal within an hour. Some say that doing a short run in a tired state boosts fitness. Either way whatever it actually does in physiological terms these runs do seem to get the legs working again, and if you are feeling a bit stiff it seems to ease things a bit. Perhaps it is a bit of a mental thing too, convincing yourself you are OK after the previous days effort. I managed to dodge the slug population of Warmley and Mangotsfield quite well.

Tuesday I had a speed session which to be honest I was dreading. 7 miles with 2/4/6 at a 10K-ish pace. I'd gone back home from Bristol to run with Dudley Ladies, I managed to run the first easy mile with them before taking off like a rocket. My 3 fast miles were 7.45mm or slightly quicker, and they felt ok. Not quite Mo standards, but for me that's quite good. I actually caught them back up for the last mile (they did 5) so all good.

So why was I dreading it? Well it was a stiflingly hot evening for starters although I've found it easier to run in the heat recently - if you just get on with it you get used to it. Let’s face it - not been much of an issue this summer. I have a bit of paranoia that a lot of slow running means my legs and my lungs will "forget" how to run fast. I am almost certain if I had a bad speed session and could only muster 8.30mm for the same level of effort as 7.45mm previously I'd feel like it was a massive step backwards. In reality I hardly ever have a bad speed session, but funny how one off day / off session has the potential to do my head in. The logical part of me says we all have off days but the other bit of me doesn't listen. So I dreaded it because something *might* go wrong... typical me worrying about something that hasn't *actually* happened!!! Anyway over all it appears I am getting quicker at the moment.

Wednesday I had a rest day, but I actually went out for a run with my work colleague M in the evening. He was freshly back from a 3 week holiday in Las Vegas. People take the piss a bit, but he is also a runner going out 2-3 times a week when he is at home. Because we've been staying away we've been going out for 3-3.5 miles when he would have gone out and done his home routes with his mates. I am not the quickest of runners, but I am faster than him, and I have no problem running with someone whose preferred running pace is 2mm+ slower than my "easy" / Long run pace. As long as the pace is not going to knacker me I am pretty happy to go out and do a little extra run any time with anyone. It seems 3 weeks off have helped M's aches and pains and he seemed to be running more comfortably than before. There are some running routes in Bristol I wouldn't have investigated if it wasn't for having the company of M, I get a bit nervous about doing new routes on my own if I don't know the area so it has worked really well. From a personal safety point of view I have to ask myself who is protecting who though.

So towards the end of each week the 4 day long run build up starts. This week I started tapering a bit - 10/14/10/18 LOL. With a normal single marathon I would be cutting right down now, but my legs will have an awful lot of stress on them over the 4 days so we don't want them to be too relaxed going in to the event.

Thursday: 10 miles. Pretty much as soon as I stepped out of the building at work, the heavens opened and I mean opened. It was like someone chucking a bucket of water from the sky for about an hour. Within a matter of seconds the downhill from work was flooded, inches of water appeared from seemingly nowhere both on road and pavement. Water was bubbling out of drain covers, cars driving past were creating huge waves, but it didn't matter because I was completely, utterly and totally soaked to the skin within the first quarter mile. Quite an amazing deluge, that only really stopped as I got to the 5 mile turnaround point having gone up through Ashton court and over the bridge. I could see car drivers laughing at me and a solitary ice cream van man parked up in Ashton court was wiping the steam off the inside of the window of his van looking at me in total disbelief. Still it got me thinking I could have 4 days of this in Ireland. Best get the shittiness out of the way in training. At least I can say I prepared in everything!! I have at least 4 pairs of trainers I could comfortably wear for a Marathon so I think I will be taking all of them and having a fresh pair on every day in case I end up paddling on one of the days. I don't think there is much point in raincoats unless it is going to be cold. Skin is waterproof!

It had been my plan to get up at 05.30 Friday, scoff some porridge and go and do 14 miles before work. No chance. Thursday evening we went out for food and decided rather than do nothing after eating we would go to the cinema. It was a really weird atmosphere in the restaurant, as in people kept knocking things over, dropping and smashing stuff and generally being clumsy. A waiter nearly tripped over my chair, and then to top it all off another waiter slipped on a stray chip and ended up crashing a massive tray of empty dishes over his own head. All his colleagues scurried in to clear it up, but no one actually asked him if he was ok. What is the world coming to? :( When he came over for something and I asked him if he was alright he looked genuinely shocked! All this chaos meant we got quite a late showing of a film and ended up getting back to the hotel at about 11.50pm. Knackered. Actually to be honest on Wednesday / Thursday I found myself feeling slightly unwell at times.

I have to wonder if some of this midweek excessive tiredness and weird feeling was due to high sweetie consumption on Wed/Thu. M had got us some American sweets to share at work, and thinking back I think the amount of very bright food colouring, artificial flavouring and pure sugar I ate midweek might have actually made me feel a bit funny, e.g. slightly hyper followed by a massive crash in energy. I shall be avoiding that sort of thing in future (don't mean to sound ungrateful!). I do think it made me feel off colour (bright cherry Jolly Rancher red to be precise)

So Friday morning the alarm went off as planned, and I could tell without getting out of bed it was dark, windy and raining outside. In bed I stayed. I can get up when I have to, and I am better than I used to be, but it would be fair to say I am not really a morning person. I love my bed. We left Bristol at 3pm, and after picking up M's son from his Grandparents etc I finally got home just before 7pm. I had crashed out on what was probably another sugar low in the car, but when I woke up and we were still in that long M5 traffic jam surrounded by every caravan and motor home in the northern hemisphere I started to get very twitchy and fretful, desparately wishing I had just got on with it at 5.30am and mentally kicking myself. I got home, did a wonder woman change and out again at 7.05pm.

And you know what? I bloody did it. 14 miles knocked out with a frightening focus really. I just ran and ran, no faffing, just got it done. By the time I got about 4 miles from home it was dark, but I was on a safe main road so I felt ok with it. And for all the tiredness and end of week "meh" this 14 - it just felt effortless. I think that's positive sign. I didn't feel like I'd run at the end of it.

Saturday I went with my friend Jane for a run in a different setting, Telford to Ironbridge. I have obviously covered a lot of miles in training and I've found that variety of routes, and doing runs with different people is the key to staying sane. I'd wanted to go with her for a while, another friend lives in Telford and has a route that ends at... THE MOST AMAZING CAKE SHOP IN THE WORLD. (Yup, I liked it a lot.) It was great to run somewhere new. But back to those cakes!!!! OH MY GOD! They really are very special. Amazing. And little tea cosies on the tea pots. And the Queen and her corgis were there. There is also a pork pie shop up the road. Next time, first stop pie and cupcake for pudding. Health food. I love Ironbridge, and I love the cupcake shop.

I need one of these....

Invasion of the tea cozies

Spoiling what would have been a nice picture of the cakes (I speak for myself here Jane)

So is Marathon training is an excuse to eat crap? No! My first Marathon I expected to lose loads of weight training and I never did. I think people seriously overestimate what they are burning, and therefore actually end up eating too much under the premise of "carb loading" (in actual fact leading up to the event it is the proportion of carbs you should change and NOT the amount). At the moment I seem to be getting comments from people (esp those I haven't seen for a while) that I look slimmer. I suppose 70 miles a week does that to you. I don't weigh myself that often but I think there may have been a shape change, and without meaning to sound like I spend vast amounts of time feeling myself up(!) I do notice how my leg muscles, stomach muscles and even my arms feel different. Running this high mileage makes me feel good and I want to keep it up after the Quad.

Saturday afternoon despite my legs feeling OK I crashed out again. Not sugar related this time, For the first time in a while I simply had nothing to do for the afternoon, and on days like this the general pattern seems to be:

Get up early
Run
Shower
Lunch
Tell self "I will just have a little lie down on the bed for 30 mins".
3 hours later wake up :-0

Gah. Still awake at 2am on Sunday morning.

Sunday was the muggiest day of the year, off we all went doing a 10 mile loop sweating our proverbials off and myself and Massie carried on doing another 8 stopping for water at every possible point. As I drunk it, it just came out of my skin. Massie did well - 18 is the furthest she has ever run, it was lovely to see a big happy smile she was so happy to have done it. She looked so comfortable too. I think she is going to rock the half marathon she is doing in a few weeks.

Me - well a mere 65 miles this week, so yes I have cut back. Oh and I keep counting down T-x days at the top of this blog looking at it I've discovered that I've been counting down from the day of the last marathon. So the first one is in T-10 days (SHIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!), and a fortnight today I will hopefully be dangling my feet in the water by the Redcastle hotel surrounded by empty Guinness glasses :)

Dreams

One of the best running experiences I've had was the Manchester Marathon.

On that day I got a massive marathon PB almost breaking 4 hours (and lets face it any other conditions and I would have done - but it's still something I want to prove). I battled the elements of sleet, light snow, gale force winds, and flooded paths / roads ankle deep in water. When I got that medal round my neck it really felt well earned. But that's not why Manchester was the best.

At the 3 or 4 mile mark at Manchester, I was jogging along some industrial roads, and there were a few spectators around clapping as much as their frozen hands would allow. Then on the side of the road, I saw two raincoated figures jumping around like lunatics.

Them: "NATALIE....NAAAAATTTTAAAALLLIIIIEEE!!!!"
Me: <gapsing in shock> "OH MY GOD!!!!"
Random Bloke running next to me: "So you know them then?? Hahaha"

Two of my lovely friends Wendy and Heather from Dudley Ladies had got in the car on the Sunday morning and driven up to Manchester to come and support ME. They were fully aware of the forecast, and it didn't put them off. No one has ever really done that sort of thing for me before. It was so unexpected and I cannot describe the complete rush of emotion that went through me when I saw them. From that point onwards it kept my mind active thinking would I see them again out on the course, would I see them at the end. I figured they would probably be somewhere at the finish. They were, they saw me power over the line (well I was in my head...), and after collecting my medal they saw me cry. I hope they know what a difference they made to me that day. We went for a meal afterwards and they just simply made it one of the best days ever.

I have literally just woken up from a weird dream that a similar thing happened in Ireland, in a nutshell on the last day of the Quad familiar faces from various areas of my life were there on the course. I know this isn't gonna happen, I mean flying to Londonderry and ending up finding me on the course / in Moville on the last day is an expensive and time consuming jaunt.

I had an odd experience on Sunday that brought home the mental side of long distance to me. A van had parked half across the pavement as I came back round the village green. This was at about the 21 mile point (I cocked up my route planning and ended up doing 21.5). The fact that the van was there and I had to manoeuvre round it requiring extra steps and effort really pissed me off to the point where I felt like picking up a rock from one of the many well kept front gardens and smashing the screen, or scratching out "ILLEGALLY PARKED" on the side of it. Silly I know. Obviously I would never *do* anything!!!

So anyway I can dream, and mentally I might have to use that false "there is a slight chance my friends will be there" hope to keep me going. I think with something like this there are a number of head tricks one can use to keep on track. I'll let you know what they are afterwards!!!

T - 21 days: A week of being lost

Ok so this was my last mahoosive week before cutting down for the event. Another 70 mile week (Having said that I've just got my plan for next week and I suppose in relative terms it is still high miles)

After a previous heavy week I got given a somewhat puny sounding 3 miler to do on Monday. Whilst I love any opportunity to get out, it seemed very odd setting off, coming back up the big hill to work, stopping my watch and not having a single bead of sweat. And a rest day Tuesday! I felt lost. It wasn't right. Yes these rest and easy days are important but it has rammed home the fact that I need to be thinking of something to do when the 4x4 is finished. Maybe I should just enjoy running for what it is but I kind of do that anyway.... what to do next.... Still, I have time to decide and I don't think there will be anything "silly" until next year.

Wednesday was the last one of the Halesowen midweek race series. I'm sorry if anyone from Halsowen AC ever reads this, but I hate this course. Or at least I did. It is 3 twisty turny laps on some quite narrow paths, with tree roots, rocks, some drops that are so steep I always feel like I need a climbing harness. I love XC but this course I have had some depressing experiences on. There was an outside chance I might be in with an age group prize, and I needed to do some speed work, so amazingly despite pointing out the downsides of the course to my coach he actually suggested that I do it. Gah! Totally surprised me there. Thanks!!! :)

It did not start too well, I believe it is very important to do a warm up and a cool down when you are attempting to run at (relative) speed so on the WU I went to do a quick look at the course, and some bits were pretty messy. There is also a little wooden bridge that goes across a stream. I believe they had put some matting down for "safety" reasons however this saw me almost sliding off sideways in to the water - it was lethal! Rather than freak me out I found the whole situation so comical that in a strange way it actually relaxed me - I thought it would be impossible to put any proper effort in so was resigned to a plod

So we assembled and started, and as we went round the athletics track and on to the main course I felt quite good. And so it carried on. The nobbly bits didn't seem too bad, the boggy bits were ok, the big grassy hill was a mere pimple and I was passing people the whole way so grew in confidence. I was still slightly careful on the bridge though, and there is a particularly steep drop where I think I said to the marshal "I bloody hate this bit" on every single lap to which he smiled politely obviously thinking "get down there you wimp". I minced down that but otherwise - all good. An average of 9.00mm is a good XC pace for me, so I'm really happy with that off the back of some really high mileage weeks. Turns out that the lady I needed to beat in my age category was about 20 seconds in front of me, but as I didn't really know who I was gunning for I'm not too gutted (I think actually even if I'd beat her it might have been mathematically impossible t get in to 3rd place) but I don't need a cheap bottle of wine to keep in the fridge for 3 years before throwing it out un-opened. I had a good run!

Some of the delightful Stourbridge R.C.

Thursday night I was lucky enough to have some company for my 10 miler. The lady I was running with had been having a few bad runs, so it was nice that she came out of the end of it feeling like she'd had a much better one. Sometimes after a few bad runs your mental confidence just goes a bit, hopefully now she is on an upward spiral. I love having different people to chat to on runs. For someone with my inept social skills it is a good way of socializing and actually talking to new people. It was however not a good night, my lovely friend H's husband had taken a turn for the worse and died on Friday morning. I feel totally gutted for her. She came to the running club on Sunday and I hope she knows she has always got her friends. I know it's what people always say but it's true.

Saturdays run was a 12 miler. Or it was supposed to be. I felt OK after Fridays hot and sweaty 17, Zoe and I headed off down the canal towards Halesowen. She had some maps in her rucksack, and decided that she really needed to find a footpath that she had meant to find on a previous run but couldn't. This did not bode well! It started OK, but we lost the path, ended up in a huge field, and somehow ended up in the middle of a patch of ground that had nettles in all directions. My poor legs are still tingling as I write this on Sunday night. We were lost. We tried to head for some houses, but short of making a run through someone's back garden we were stuck. From my Garmin upload it seems that we spent ages going round in a big circle, thinking we could find a way out of where we were - in the end we doubled back and went on the road. So almost 13 then.

It wasn't the nettles that gave me a complete sense of humour failure, but the fact that as we emerged from the undergrowth some old people out walking their dogs were there. One of them immediately started snarling, not in a playful way (the dogs not the OAPs lol). You can tell when it is serious. I love dogs, but despite me stopping in my tracks, turning away from the dog and glaring at these people to "get that THING away from us!!!!" they seemed completely un bothered by the lack of control they had over it, or how much it may be upsetting us. I shall stop there because it will make me go off on one and it is too late in the evening. It's not the dog’s fault that's for sure.

Sunday I did 21 miles. As I mentioned before, H turned up which was great, I think sometimes in times of severe upset and stress if you can get out there for a run it is a help. Not a cure all obviously but I hope she still manages to make it in the next few busy weeks.

Again, this is getting dull and old news I'm sure but my legs still feel great. Onwards........ :)

Can you dedicate a run...?

If you can then this evenings 17 was for Steve.

Heather if you ever read this little diary back at some point, I was thinking about you most of last night, and most of today after I heard the news.

Life can be just........ ugh I don't really have any words  :(

Another reason at the end of the month to push on through and raise lots of money

xx

T - 28 days: High Mileage Weeks

It seems that every week I am running higher mileage than I have before. To be expected considering what I am putting myself up for.

On the quiet (or perhaps it is obvious to everyone else...) I am a bit of a geek about statistics when it comes to running, and probably many other things (Have you seen Star Wars in Ascii?? BRILLIANT!). I log every run - the distance, the time, the weather conditions, what shoes I was wearing, what sports bra(!), where I went, if the run was flat, hilly etc, surface underfoot, and the type of session it was. So obviously it goes without saying I know my total weekly mileage:

2 Weeks ago - 63 miles
Last week -  66 miles
This week 70 miles

Holy crap! I quite happliy average the 50s but this is new territory to me.

Strangely it hasn't seemed like a chore. I've managed to find the time. I'm quite lucky in that I don't really have a rigid work routine, so I can take a little more than hour for lunch or bunk off a bit early to do a run - however my guilty conscience dictates that I will make up the time elsewhere either by staying late or stuffing a sandwich down with one hand whilst typing with another. At the moment it seems to be working. Despite some horrible weather conditions recently I am looking forward to every run at the moment. My legs whilst occasionally feeling tired at the end of a run seem to be feeling good and recovering well.

This week I had a pretty easy run on Monday with the club. My legs felt good after the previous Sundays hilly Lake District 20 - although I can't say I was massively pleased to be dropped by the "steady" group in the middle of the woods because we were doing an easy chit chat pace. Thank goodness us girls stick together and Emma and I found our way back without being axe-murdered. Supposedly they did try to find us so I can't be too cross.

Picture the scene, it could have happened so differently:

Interviewer: "So Mo Farah, what do you think cost you the Gold medal today"

Mo Farah: "Well I'm not sure, but I used to beat everyone else down the road back to the club in training, was always first in to the showers and I used to get the pick of Lynn's cheese wraps before anyone else got there."

My point is I don't think too fast a pace in training is the way to go but hey, I take some blame less chat more running we might have kept them in sight.

"Just run a bit quicker . OK?"

Despite a lot of long runs and slow miles, I have been keeping a bit of speed in the mix and was somewhat surprised at my pace on Tuesday when I had to do a run with some 1 mile effort sections in. I ran some miles at the effort I would expect to run a 10K at, ended up clocking 3 miles that started with a 7. It felt great. I will have to get to some sort of 5K or other short distance race soon and see what happens before this effect wears off.

These days I do a lot of my running in Bristol. I have a few routes from work, and there are some really nice ones. Where I work is basically at the top of a big hill, and I think that 1 mile climb at the end of every run can only be a good thing for strengthening the legs. These days I have no fear of hills in fact some hills that I used to notice seem to have dissapeared these days. Thursday lunch time saw me winding my way up through Ashton court for a (short) long run, with deer peering at me from over the fences. I'm a sucker for this sort of scenery - I think I'm regressing, loving the routes that have cutesy animals (no horses or cows on the loose thank you) and the prospect of seeing balloons and other interesting stuff. I made my way over the suspension bridge and as usual the heavens opened at the furthest possible point from home. With rain dripping off my nose and down my back, for the first time I noticed they have signs up with the Samaritans phone number on the suspension bridge, although I was in more danger of throwing a tourist off rather than myself. FFS have some awareness of your surroundings and don't just stand there gawping when you see me running towards you! 

One of the more amazing sights from some of my Bristol runs

I've explored loads of new routes whilst down there - the Festival Way, Blagdon Lake, Clifton Downs, the Bristol to Bath Cycle path in both directions from Warmley. Fabulous. Things I'd never see if I didn't run.. I shall miss those routes if/when we run out of work there and we get moved on to a different contract. 

I got back home Friday night and proceeded to do another long run, and up at eight am Saturday to do... another long run. I train with and without music, but I have to say Saturday I was feeling great and bopping along to "Sounds of the sixties on Radio 2". Yes I am officially old. Secretly I also quite like Pick of the Pops with Tony and Elaine Page "Musicals" show on a Sunday. Shoot me now, or at least get me a new zimmer frame for Christmas.

I'd been looking forward to Sunday, as I've been staying away a fair bit whilst my work buddy is living up in Las Vegas - it seemed like I hadn't seen the girls from Dudley Ladies for ages. Another few hours putting the world to rights (one of them very kindly stayed with me to 16.5 miles - it always helps not to have to do these things on your own) and an end to the week - 20 miles in the bag. 

I am sad to say that one of my friends husbands is suffering from cancer in an almost identical form to what my Auntie had - he had been given a first dose of chemo but it doesn't seem to be working - in a similar way to her the cancer is quite agressive :( and another running friends mother is also similarly ill. I really feel their pain. It definitely reminds me why I am doing this and makes me feel more determined to give it some effort and dig deep when I'm feeling the pain. In real terms I don't actually know what pain is do I?

I've just treated myself to a Sunday roast dinner and then the afternoon in bed catching up on the Olympic Women's Marathon and Triathlon. Stuff the subsequent Sunday night/Monday morning insomnia, sometimes that level of laziness is just what you need. Recovery is as important as training! :)

28 days to go and its all good.

Why am I doing this? Part 2

I try not to moan about my life when people ask "how are you?" because I believe I'm lucky. Like everyone I go through minor (they don't seem it at the time) trials and tribulations but I live comfortably, have a lovely family and friends for which I am very grateful. I've just realised that might sound like I'm erring towards saying I'm religious. I'm not religious at all being a scientist and a confirmed atheist but I do try and be kind and nice to people. It makes me happier as a person to live that way.

My family is a relatively small unit, and my Auntie was always around. She was not my Auntie really, but actually my Dad's cousin (they were like brother and sister) and I suppose there is something about lady relatives / parents close female friends of a certain age that means they are your 'Auntie'. My Auntie despite being a few years older than my Dad, was really cool. Anyone who knows me might argue that I have slightly odd ideas of what "cool" is. Yes she could be a bit of a hypochondriac, a bit fussy but for someone of her years she was more "with it" regarding popular culture than my parents and was great fun to have a conversation with. When I was little she always had cats and dogs which I used to like because we never had either at home and you can't cuddle a goldfish.She was always interested in my running, what I had been up to and where I had been on my travels. The stranger personality traits she had were not really here fault. Just the way she had been brought up really. When my Uncle (another cousin of my Dad's and also a cousin of hers - strange family huh) died she moved in just over the road from my parents, so was around a lot more. When I went on holiday, or at Christmas / Easter etc I always purchased presents and goodies in triplicate.

I've experienced death in my life, thankfully simply through old age and whilst it is upsetting some comfort can be gained from knowing that the person had a good innings and all that, and didn't know much about it. My Uncle died of cancer a few years ago in 2003 which was mercifully quick, but awful nonetheless.

In the late summer of 2011, Auntie complained of stomach pains, but they seemed to be a bit on and off. I was up visiting my parents one weekend and after a long run went to the fridge (as 30-something children who have left home still do) to eye up a nice looking strawberry milkshake inside the fridge door. Before I proceeded to rip the top off - milk is very good for post long run recovery - I was told to leave it as it was part of Aunties shopping. My parents weren't quite sure what was up but believed that she was on a faddy milkshake diet because her clothes had got a bit tight, and in actual fact she had set the tumble dryer too high and was shrinking them in a comedy way. Then one night over the summer she had called out the night doctor who had admitted her in to hospital. How things can change in such a short space of time - a blink of an eye later and it fell in to place. She was drinking milkshakes because food was painful to swallow, after numerous investigative tests we found she had a tumour in the oesophagus, also in the pancreas and beginnings of tumours in the lungs.

My Auntie was obviously upset at being told she was terminally ill, but my poor Dad didn't know what had hit him. In all my years I have never seem him get so upset about something. I regret to say that one morning after a particularly rubbish nights sleep I ended up taking offence to something he said about me getting up late and starting a bit of an argument. It was then I saw just how upset my Dad was... and I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for driving him to a near meltdown but there isn't a lot I can do to change it now apart from showing some restraint in the future and not reacting. It was a shock to see him in that light.

My Auntie remained in hospital for quite some time, being fed by a tube down the nose direct in to the stomach and had a stent inserted near the growing blockage to try and relieve the feeding situation. The doctors had opted not to give her chemotherapy. After the stent they took the tube out and things really seemed to improve. We had a visit where she was practically up and about, happy, smiling and was eating grapes we had brought her. We were optimistic. This was in September. I started thinking we might get her home, and maybe she would still be around for Christmas.

In mid October 2011, I went out to Amsterdam to run the Marathon. I had a lovely little holiday, but was dogged by feeling like I was coming down with a cold the whole time I was out there. I spent the whole flight back on the Monday sneezing my head off. When I got back I got a call out of the blue to say Auntie had taken a turn for the worse and gone in to the Arthur Rank hospice in Cambridge. My immediate reaction was that I should come home but the idea of germ ridden me walking in to a hospice simply wasn't an option, I could do a lot of damage to a lot of very ill people. So I waited and waited, progressively feeling worse and worse as the week went on. I spent the weekend in bed with a box of tissues and some lemsip watching the Great Birmingham run on the telly on Sunday.

That Sunday afternoon she passed away, my parents had been there pretty much to the end. The last few days had been horrible, she had been in a coma I suppose the administration of Morphine and other pain killing drugs is a sort of legal assisted suicide because there comes a point where your body can't tolerate the dose any more. In the short time she was there, the hospice had made a big effort to help her, not only with the practical aspects of medical care, but also putting on activities and doing things that help the patient feel better in themeslves. I was oviously upset at first, then I think we all went in to uber practical mode. I found the funeral very hard, seeing the coffin go past us to follow it to the service it really just did me in. I spent the whole service just standing there with tears streaming down my face. In a sense I'm pleased that the last vision that I had of my Auntie was one of being upbeat and on the mend rather than lying there motionless or in and out of a coma.

 

I think I'll leave that there. The hospice looked after her really well (the same place also looked after my uncle) and ever since then I have wanted to do something for them. I can't deny that the 4 in 4 is a big personal challenge, and this seemed the perfect opportunity to do some fundraising for the cause. Closer to the event and afterwards I'm going to try concentrate on raising more on the money side - at the moment all I seem to do is work and train. Thinking of having a cake sale at work and the running club rather than giving it away for free!

Sadly whilst I've told my parents I'm running 4 marathons in 4 days I haven't actually told them about the fundraising bit. Every time I think about telling them it makes me feel so upset I chicken out. I have a tendency sometimes to chicken out of these sorts of emotional / upsetting things. I think there is going to be a bit of a tearful phonecall after the last Marathon on the Sunday.

So my training has been going well and I will continue to focus on writing about that. (If anyone has bothered to read this far sorry if I've depressed you!). I think it sort of explains where my head is at with regards to doing this challenge.

I've been somewhat shocked  so far by peoples generosity in sponsoring me. It seems people believe in me and that makes me feel so so happy - its a massive boost. Do I believe in myself here? Well I'm starting to actually. The Gobsters training regime has seen me replicate the fatigue of the event by running something like:

Mon -  6 Miles
Tues - 7 or 8 miles either progressive or with some hard miles in the middle
Weds - Rest
Thurs - 10 -ish miles
Fri - 14,15,16 ish miles
Sat - 10-12 miles
Sunday - around 20 miles

(I have obviously built up to this and was still fit from training for the Manchester Marathon in April where I got a PB - 4.02 in an Arctic gale!). I'm really enjoying it despite getting through pairs of trainers rather too quickly, not to mention massive consumption of carbohydrate gels. I have a desire to start swimming again, but that has been put on hold due to the sheer embarassment factor of having a shocking runners tan on my legs - my self confidence doesn't need to see me being laughed out of a public pool. Why mention this... well I have a fairly decent racing bike that I like to get out on when I can and the word IRONMAN keeps popping in and out of my head.....

I've found from some of the training runs that a big hill climb at the end of a 66 mile week can cause pain, but I simply tell myself there is worse pain to have and after all it is just another minute / hour of my life. My recovery has been pretty damn good though, to the point where if I pace it right I will probably be able to run a half decent marathon time without waking up with hurty legs the next day.

http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/NatalieDellar4in4

Why am I doing this? Part 1

I had intended to update this blog a bit more often - I think I probably will as the event time draws closer and I start the inevitable fretting. Quite frankly I've been out running so much I seem to have very little time for anything. I keep up with current affairs by listening to the radio - I don't have time to watch TV any more (not that I'm massively gutted). Anyway I want a record of how I've felt along the way, so tonight I want to get down something about why I am doing this.

Firstly I suppose a little background around my running career.

I've run since about 2005. I joined a fabulous running club down the road from me, Dudley Ladies. At the time I was 18 stone. Why? Answer: I don't know. At the time I was in comfortable relationship with someone who loved me for how I was, sounds like a cliche but true - all the pounds kept going on after various holidays, parties and festive seasons and not coming off. Anyway it just goes to show that you can be a "runner", and in fact put on weight if you don't eat right. I was a happy 13mm runner running 3 times a week -  2 x 3 milers Tues/Thu + 7-10 miles on a Saturday.

I didn't really join the running club to lose weight, just because I wanted to do something for me, and running was something I had previously enjoyed. I used to be an OUWBC rower - this involved some hardcore nutter exercise levels and we had done a bit of running as land training which I also liked once I'd got past the initial puffed out stage. Anyway, even at that weight and level of difficulty it presented I genuinely loved running. I did every race going. boy do I know what it is like to be last and have those looks of pity. I really do. I ran with a wonderful lady Denise who kept me going when otherwise I may have given up.

The biggest favour my Doctor ever did me in late 2007 was suggesting I "lost a few lbs" because I had turned 30 and risk factors of nasty medical things were higher. I did. Being female I get cagey talking about these weight related subjects but basically by late 2008 I had lost over 5 stone by not eating CRAP. As I'd started to notice the improvement in my running pace in the summer of 2008 I secured a place in the London Marathon 2009. Late 2008 I joined Stourbridge Running Club, purely because they had a different set of club nights to DL and it meant I could run 4 week days a week with a club in the build up to London. I still run with both clubs. Stourbridge really helped me make a big improvement. Running with different speed groups, doing structured speed work and cross country races, which I have actually grown to love. Bizarrely I am the men's captain - I think (hope) it seems to work.

A lot of people say that the training is the hard bit for these events, but I can hand on heart say that I loved the training for my first Marathon and I still do love the training build up today. I love seeing the outdoors, I love seeing all the new sights and smells, I love chatting to my friends as we run. I love the feeling of running along, and pushing myself a bit further or faster than I did the last time. Road, trail, cross country, snow I don't care. I even did a 20 miler on a treadmill one winter when there was sheet ice outside. I don't care if its urban, countryside, sunny or raining (ok don't quote me on that last one!). I have seen and experienced things that I never would have if I didn't run and I think I am a better person for it.

London 2009 went off OK, 4.35 which for a first Marathon I was over the moon with. Yes you can have a good guess at your marathon pace from your training runs and secretly hope for a certain time, but the marathon is a bastard and can cut your delusions of getting that time down to size when you least expect it - but I was happy, I'd had a good run, ran all the way and felt I'd done myself justice. That same year I completed the Longford Marathon (4:11) as a training run for my first Ultra marathon, the JW Ultra. The JW runs from Stratford Upon Avon to Bournville in Birmingham and despite being looked down upon by a lot of Ultra runners as "easy" being "only" 30 miles I clocked 5:23. Looking back I had run Longford too hard and I was knackered at the JW. Still you live and learn and over all it was all an enjoyable experience.

First Marathon - London 2009

After my first Ultra - 30 miles. Note the glazed look and sunburn

The next year, 2010 London again. with my new found experience I trained hard for London, but again looking back I did all of my long runs way way too fast. I did enjoy the training, hey I was getting massive PBs at 30K, 20 miles etc - distances that people don't really give a shit about! It made me feel good at the time but I lacked vision of the bigger picture. Eventually I found the training a bit wearing. Come the Marathon day, after about 10 miles I had nothing left. It was quite possibly more mental tiredness than physical but I ran 4.34. Argh - almost but not quite a step backwards. So much more training than 2009 and one minute quicker! I felt low. It was in the summer of 2010 I lost it a bit and dabbled in the world of Triathlon. I'm a pretty OK swimmer, admittedly shit on the bike and running, well I'm middling to slow really. The little Triathlon I entered in Cheshire I won!!!! To be fair it was the race for life of Triathlons with about 3 other girls who were serious competition, but I like to think I have retired at the top of my game. (....joke :) )

Post my first and only Triathlon

In April 2010 during the build up to London I had run the Half Marathon at Connemara, Galway in Ireland. It was an absolute pig of a course, a very very hilly 13.1 miles. I was inspired to see the Ultra runners who had completed 26.2 miles before hitting the 13.1 I had just run. So yes, you guessed it - before the awful London I had found myself entering Connemara 39.3 for 2011. After the London experience I was a tiny bit scared. Because I needed a holiday (ha!), and with thoughts of what would be good training I also entered a series of running events in Disneyland, Florida in Jan 2011.

It is now that it seems an appropriate time to mention Gobi, my coach. I met him through friends and through the website I log my training on. Gobi is a retired Ultra runner (100km champion) now a nutter cyclist. He is a Welshman with a barely understandable Scottish accent who doesn't take any crap, and if I'm honest he is a little bit scary, but in a good way. I asked him to help me, which he agreed to do in late 2010. First analysis of my training: "YOU RUN EVERYWHERE TOO FAST!!". He has helped me more than he will ever know, and with his guidance I've been able to achieve things I didn't think I could do - and do them quite well for little me (OK it's all relative but it's a fact). It was hard at first to get the pace discipline of doing slower and different paced runs as instructed but I got there, and relatively quickly I think. Anyone who says "I can't run slow" is either a liar or not trying hard enough. The main thing was after London 2010 disaster I got back that love of running thanks to him and I shall be forever grateful. That is all.

My coach - scary or what?

So I rocked up at Disney in 2011 having trained a bit slower and with better aerobic endurance did the 5K at Epcot on the Friday (27:00), the 1/2 Marathon on the Saturday (2:11) and the full Marathon on the Sunday (4:23). Brilliant and the most entertainment I've had running. Surreal and a bit bonkers. I high fived Donald Duck finishing the Marathon, ran through the Magic Castle and almost took out Chip N Dale when I threw away a half empty water bottle. My legs survived remarkably well.

The surreal-ness of the Disney Marathon.

April 2011 was then time for Connemara 39.3, described by someone who had climbed Everest and also run the event as "harder than climbing Everest" (or so we were told by the race director!) I put those training miles in. Again a common mistake would be to run too far in training, the mentality of "I'm doing a 40 miler I need to build up to a 35 mile training run" is nonsense really. In actual fact the longest run I did for this was the Milford 21 (+ lots of other 20 milers) but I had a training plan around these long runs based on the Ultra. When the day came I was lucky to find 2 ladies who were friendly and we all stayed together for the entire run. I basically ran 10 minute miles at Connemara, running time 6:35, with 5 mins of stops at each of the 3 checkpoints to stuff my face with gels 6:52 official time. So happy to be one of those Ultra runners that I'd been inspired by the year before. The scenery was amazing, I felt so good the whole way through. I had the best time ever. The last 13.1 was still a pig - I've concluded it doesn't really matter if you've run 26.2 miles beforehand or not!

Thumbs up at the end of 40 miles

Autumn 2011 I had a run out at the Amsterdam Marathon. What a great city. 4.23 coming down with a cold. I was feeling grotty and to be honest I had other things on my mind that summer - more on this in the next blog